SHUVOO NEWSLETTER
Issue No. 33 – March 22,
2007
“Lechem Oni” © - A Dry Brush Photo
Adaptation by Ashirah Yosefah
LECHEM ONI – PART ONE
Bread of Affliction, Bread of
Experience
By Ashirah Yosefah
Rosh
Chodesh Nissan has arrived. The month of
Aviv is upon us, a month regarded as the “first” of the months of the
Biblical/agricultural calendar by the Children of Israel, as commanded by
Hashem to Moshe (Shemot 12:2). A new yearly
cycle of Moadim (the appointed festivals of Hashem detailed in Vayyiqra 23 and
repeated in Devarim 16) are upon us.
These are “fixed times” to be proclaimed by
From Purim
to Pesach, the pressure is on: Pesach
cleaning and Pesach study! The Breslov
Haggadah is a favorite resource for pre-Pesach preparation. As one cleans the house of chametz (leaven),
this wonderful Haggadah helps you clean your soul of chametz as well.
The Breslov
Haggadah refers to the festivals as “Voices in the air. Spiritual Voices. Our ears cannot hear them, but our minds pick
them up. … And the Voice, the Call of the Festival. Whenever it comes. Wherever we are. The gnawing which gets us to feel something
very basic is missing. The searching for
something and not knowing what, which shows us our lives have gone awry. It is the Voice, the Call of the Festival
which tells us that: Yes, it is time to
return to God…”[1]
To speak of
return implies that there has been a departure.
There are been several memorable departures throughout the history of
There was
also another departure, a solitary, personal departure: Yaakov departed from his father’s house. He was fleeing from Esau, yet embarking on a
new phase of his life that would, after a period of servitude to Lavan, find
him returning to Eretz Yisrael restored in fortunate, strengthened in faith,
and, superficially and temporarily, reconciled with his brother Esau.
In Siach
Sarfei Kodesh Breslov, #710, Reb Nosson, the close student of Rebbe Nachman, is
quoted giving advice to a young man who came to him while in difficult
straits. Reb Nosson’s advice contains a
message for us all:
“So what is
your problem?’ queried Reb Nosson. ‘Our
forefather Yaakov also didn’t have a penny.
When escaping from Esau, he was divested of everything he owned. He had nothing to give his bride-to-be,
Rachel, and could only bemoan his plight with acceptance.’ (Rashi, Genesis
29:11)
The young
man didn’t get the message.
How can you
compare me with our forefather Yaakov?” he argued. “His every life-occurrence was laden with
esoteric meaning.’
‘In your
life, too, there is esoteric meaning in every occurrence,’ Reb Nosson
explained.”
Reading
this story struck a chord within me. We
are taught by our Sages that Esau’s descendents evolved into the Roman Empire
that destroyed the
Within
Christianity at large, there are millions of wonderful and sincere people,
without doubt, some of whom perform great acts of kindness and benevolence
towards
“When
escaping from Esau, he was divested of everything he owned.”
I was once
a Christian. In “escaping from Esau”, in
leaving Christianity and making my way in stages to Orthodox Jewish conversion,
I was progressively divested of everything I owned. Reb Nosson’s words are very true. First, it was my former friends. They could not, nor did they want to,
understand the direction I was heading.
Then followed my voluntarily stepping down from a high paying
professional career in favor of studying and teaching Tanach. Next was the loss of my marriage to a
wonderful man, a by-then-totally-bewildered Catholic lawyer who was left
wondering how it was that the Baptist he had married was somehow turning into
“a Jew,” turning his home life upside down it process. Good-bye emotional and material security. Good-bye fancy home, fancy car, fancy
clothes. Next came the selling off of
all my personal belongings so that I could pay my way to
Most of the
above divestments are material in nature.
They were relatively easy, in retrospect. They are externalities. It is the internal possessions that wield the
greatest impact when they are relinquished.
The uprooting of these “belongings” can be downright painful. The owner is the only one who can do the
removal. Others may influence us, but in
the end, it is our choice what stays and what goes.
So what are
some of these internal possessions that had to go? Knowledge.
Pride. Presumption. Spiritual
arrogance.
Having been
a teacher of Tanach for seven years prior to moving to
Having been
a former spiritual leader in a Lost Tribes movement and having traveled far and
wide in that capacity, I really thought I had some keen insights into the
Prophets and certain “Latter Days” scenarios that Jews needed to know,
especially since most Jews do not actively study the Prophets.
Having
spent a number of years in a Christian environment where ‘humility’ is a word
oft spoken but not truly understood, I thought I acted and spoke with this
important attribute.
Having
formerly been a Christian, then a “Messianic,” before realizing what I was
seeking could only be found within Judaism, I thought I “knew” God.
Wrong. Wrong.
Wrong. Wrong. On all the above accounts.
To be
continued in “Lechem Oni – Part II”, Shuvoo Newsletter 34, I”YH.
Ad Matai / Shuvoo
Rehov Cremieux 6A/1
It is
the desire of Shuvoo to awaken within all people the importance of mankind
turning to the Torah at this time in history. For Jews, there is a
specific responsibility to Torah, but also for Gentiles. The nations of
the world are accountable to the Universal Laws of Torah. In recent
years, many 100’s of thousands of God-fearing and Torah-loving Gentiles have
been struggling with their spiritual identities and seeking to find answers in
the midst of much religious confusion. These groups have created, been
given, and co-opted various names of identification. Shuvoo wishes to
simply speak to the God-fearers of the nations, and to speak especially to our
own people, the Jewish nation, of our unique responsibility in sharing the
Light of Torah at a time when confusion and darkness increase with each passing
day.
Shuvoo
is a division of Ad Matai, a non-profit corporation incorporated in
[1] The Breslov Haggadah, with commentary
based on the teachings of Rebbe Nachman of Breslov, compiled and adapted by
Rabbi Yehoshua Starret. Breslov Research Institute. Page 19.